A little over a year ago I developed anxiety while driving. It was a difficult season, as I am used to being able to get up and go anywhere I wish, whenever I want. Even while going through it, I forced myself to get up and get in the car, even if it meant circling the block. It gradually got better, but even driving a few months ago, there was still a feeling in the pit of my stomach. I kept worrying that this was going to be my reality for the rest of my life.
Since the pandemic and we were mandated to stay home, in the back of my mind I worried that I would be back to square one. Thank God, that the time of rest has completely loosened the knot I had been feeling. I have been able to drive routes that once seemed to tell me I couldn’t, and of course, with my trusty and dependable mom by my side.
Last year, my daughter fell in school and received a gash in her forehead. It wasn’t deep enough to go the hospital, and the nurse took care of it and called me right away. I look at her beautiful skin and wonder if she will be forever marked. Just recently when I looked at her, I noticed that while it’s still there, it’s noticeably almost gone.
This week, yet another of our men were killed. My heart breaks for what is happening in our country and with us. I’ve cried too many tears this week not feeling as if I know what to do or even say. I wonder if this will always be the case. This seems to have gone on for so long. I’m reminded that nothing lasts for ever. I pray for wisdom, common sense and justice for us.
Heavenly Father, many of our hearts are heavy and weary from all that we have seen, read and experienced. Father, we know that nothing lasts forever, but while we are going through it, it’s difficult. Will you please give us the wisdom to know what each of our roles ought to be? Give us a burning desire to go out and do the thing that you have called us to do, in the way that honors you.
