Before I get into today’s post, I want to take a moment to celebrate two very important milestones. Ten years ago, yes, ten years, I felt called to start writing this blog and even though I reluctantly did – I felt hugely unqualified to do so, I chose to start it on my mother‘s birthday. So it is with that I celebrate 10 years of God‘s faithfulness in writing and my mother‘s birthday at the same time.
I would be remissed if I did not thank all those who have read my blog for whether it’s all these years or even just once. Thank you.
Today, I want to share a lesson that I’ve been learning about being kind.
Last week I had to go to the DMV and if you can imagine, those appointments are never fun and I had two transactions that needed to be completed.
When I got there, I explained to the person checking us in that I had two appointments. She suggested I go on one line and ask if the person would be willing to do both. I was a little, unsure of this, especially because both appointments were about an hour and a half difference in time and very different in nature.
As I stood on the line waiting for the next person to become available and talking to the person directing in front of me as we wondered why the process was taking so long, I realized I had not prayed for the right person to help me.
So, I said brief prayer asking that I would get the right person. The person in front of me was called and I got called about a minute later to the next available person.
I went in, determined to be kind, even though I know that these appointments can be frustrating. After I explained my needs, I started asking questions.
Years ago, I felt as if asking questions were a bad thing, but a few months ago, I told my work colleagues that I had yet another question. Instead of being annoyed, they praised my questions because they said it allowed for much more thoughtful conversation. Wow.
Over the years, I’ve also been taught to be curious, especially in my profession, because it allows me to get to know individuals pretty quickly when I ask questions and then simply listen.
And so this is what I did with the lady. I asked questions and joked and shared some insight. In turn, she went above and beyond for me.
The next day I sent my mom instructions to do something. I ended with ‘be kind’. Not because my mom is typically unkind. I have just realized that as the saying goes, ‘we get more with sugar than we get with vinegar’.
She later explained to me that she put her request in, and the person gave her a bit of attitude, but she remembered what I had said about being kind and so she decided to respond with kindness instead of attitude. In turn, this person who had the authority, gave her exactly what she needed and even better.
Sometimes we are in situations where we might be in the right, or entitled to a certain outcome, but if we remember that there is someone on the other end with feelings and emotions just like us, we can be a little bit kinder, and we might be very surprised at the outcome. Especially when we are interacting with others who made have just had to deal with someone else with a bad attitude.
Two verses come to mind.
Proverbs 15:1 ‘a gentle answer, turns away wrath, but a harsh word starts up anger.’
Proverbs 16:24 ‘pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.’
The next time I’m contemplating whether I show up kindly or an anger, I pray that I remember these simple lessons.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for continuing to give me these lessons so many years later. Thank you for allowing me to intentionally look for what you are teaching me even in the simplest interactions. Thank you for growing me in the ways that you have, through these lessons.