I had a somewhat troubling experience yesterday. I don’t like to talk about what I do, but this was a poignant lesson, and I feel the need to share, so please bear with me.
My daughter was out of school for the day, but I had to work. As the weather sucked on Sunday, I didn’t make it to the supermarket to buy her necessary lunch items. In her normal school, lunch is provided, so this is not a meal I usually know what to provide her. I figured that on my way in to the city, I’d just pick up a turkey and cheese sandwich.
I stopped at a place I go to from time to time and ordered the desired turkey and cheese sandwich. I paid for it, and put it in her lunch box. When I picked her up later in the evening, she started complaining that she was hungry. I started thinking to myself there’s no way she could be hungry if she ate her lunch. So, I continued walking and told her that she could get something when we were closer to home. But she kept complaining that she was hungry. Ok – I couldn’t ignore that – I looked around for somewhere we could stop. While I ordered something, I looked in her bag for the update of how her day went. Lunch was eaten – no nap. Ok. I expect a cranky child, but she shouldn’t be hungry. I looked in her bag to find the whole sandwich, pretty much in tact. Upon closer examination, it did not look like turkey, and only a few little bites had been taken.
I almost threw it out, after much examining, but realized I was literally across the place from where I bought it. In typical NY fashion, as I was already running late, I still stopped and told them I wanted a refund, as they had clearly given me the wrong sandwich. The person said they couldn’t give me any money back, but I could have what I wanted. Not my ideal, as I wasn’t hungry, but it’s better than nothing. I chose a buffalo chicken panini, and had them put it in a to-go plate, as now I had only about 15 minutes to make it to my train.
As I was nearing the train station, dealing with the mob of people, and a stroller, I heard someone crying out that she was hungry and needed food. She was sitting on the street corner begging for food. I knew by then, I had about 7 minutes to still get to the train, and as I wasn’t alone, it was going to be really cutting it close with a child, bags and a stroller. God, is this you telling me that I need to give up my panini? I don’t know, but this woman is in tears, and I really don’t need this food. After quickly debating with myself whether I had the time, I stopped, pulled out the closed container with the panini, and handed it to her. I expected a ‘thank you’. Instead, what I got was an attitude and ‘ma’am, I can’t take this. I don’t know what’s in it’ as I saw the previous tears streaming down of how hungry she was and needed something to eat. Although I left it with her, I don’t think she kept it.
I walked away feeling puzzled, thinking if I were that hungry, I’m going go take what’s offered. I’m somewhat of a germaphobe, so I understand a little where she’s coming from.
It really bothered me, and I kept on thinking about it, and the more I could see how I can apply it to my own life. I cry out to God for help on something I need. He provides for me, but not in the way I expect, and my answer is ‘No thank you God. This is not what I want. Can you please help with….’
What are you asking God for, but He’s answering in a way that you don’t expect or want?
Dear Heavenly Father, help us to hear you. Help us to hear your prompting of when we need to do something. Help us to be gracious to the gifts that you provide and not turn our noses up because it’s not what we expected. Lord, we know that you know our needs, and you know how to provide what’s best for us.